Words as Weapons
by kaze no akatsuki
Summary: In which an unprecedented side effect of Yusuke's transformation threatens to either change his world entirely or leave it in a state of total devastation- though as long as Kurama and Hiei are there to pick up the pieces, each is equally as likely to happen. A slightly dark take on Yusuke's demon transformation, with a dash of Yaoi to add some contrast. YusukexKuramaxHiei.
1. Chapter 1

**Alrighty, I really have too many fics on my hands right now, but I promised myself I would revive this piece of work after I deleted the last one. Last time, I had a hard time keeping it on track...now, however, I actually have a plot in mind for this little fic, so hopefully it pans out better.**

 **Updates will be slow, because I have a rather full plate in life right now, and because I am currently trying to write three other fics on top of this one. (A crossover Black Butler x Hellsing Ultimate, a singular Hellsing Ultimate fic, as well as an Inuyasha fic that I really should update... in case you're curious what I write) That said, the inspiration for me to revive this fic came from a song called "Secret Love Song" by Little Mix,(maybe to be posted later) and, ironically, from a Black Butler fic that was so beautifully written that the emotions have been haunting me, insisting I write them out...so here I am.**

 **Honestly, this isn't TOO dark or angsty, (so far...) but it deals with the darker side of homosexual relationships,** **the nature of demonkind** **(at least where Yusuke is concerned** **)** **, and has a LOT of Kurama in it, because I love writing his character and find him to be beautifully complicated. Hiei makes many a star appearance too...As with Inuyasha, I can't promise to keep Yusuke in character all the time here because I don't do well writing the loud and uprarious characters (though apparently I write crazy ones pretty well) so plan on some OOC-ness on his part, and possibly Kuwabara's and Yukina's.**

 **This fic takes place roughly three years after the series end, and yes, there will be spoils, so if you haven't finished the series, I recommend treading with caution.**

 **PAIRINGS: YusukexKuramaxHiei, some YusukexKeiko(Dark), KuwabaraxYukina, TouyaxJin, and mayhap some other breif moments of...something, between other characters.**

 **WARNINGS: Will appear at the head of most chapters where there are any, so watch out for that. Needless to say there will be a sex scene or two in here somewhere, but probably not for a while. I believe in slowmance, as my Inuyasha fans can tell you. :3 That said, as much as I try to keep Kurama in character, there seem to be MANY interpretations of his complex personality, and so he may at times seem OOC as well to some people. Just a heads up. FOR THIS CHAPTER:**

 **Ok. the long A/N is done, now let's get this show on the road!**

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 **CH I**

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The late winter sky seemed a sea of fire along the far spine of hills, visible from between the buildings and telephone wires as it spread over the crests and valleys like waves crashing ceaselessly against their earthen surface, throwing the bare trees into forests of shadow as the sun slowly hid its face from the world. It was roughly six in the evening, and all signs of life on the busy streets was fast dwindling as another chill night came to greet the world, its pale, sarcastic companion, the moon, following suit to bathe their little town in its own cold, silver rays, so much different from the reddish glow setting the sky on fire now.

"Shuuichi, darling, I think the pork is burning."

"Oh! Why didn't you let me know before, mother?" Kurama rushed from the kitchen window back to the stove, flipping the meat before its one side burned black, noticing with distaste that it still wound up darker than he'd intended. But it was still edible.

"Sorry about that, Mother."

"Oh, don't fret it, dear. You do seem rather distracted, though- has something been on your mind?" Shiori inquired, peering beneath her son's hair as his gaze fell to the floor. She expected the response- he really was a very reserved person, Shuuichi. She couldn't say she minded it, except that it left them little to talk about most days. Still, she respected his desire for privacy most times (unless she genuinely thought he was in trouble of some kind) though this time she made it a point to get something out of him, no matter how small. He'd been acting strange lately, and that was usually the first sign she needed to start worrying about his wellbeing. He may not have been aware of it, but he did things very repetitively when he was upset or fretful, a bit like herself. They were always little things, like the way he would step back and then forward again, repeating the action over and over as he cooked dinner for her tonight. Or the way he kept turning the choptsicks in his fingers over and over in his nimble fingers, never losing grip on them and seeming not to notice that every time he reached for the pork with them a new face of the squared sticks was facing himself as he spun them mindlessly in his fingers, seeming to have lost the answer to her question amid a sea of thoughts storming in his mind. It was things like this that clued her into her son's mental state, as well as thee fact that every now and then he turned to glance out the window, to the setting sun as if it held the answers to his unspoken questions.

"Shuuichi, darling, are you sure you're alright?" She prompted once she was sure he'd forgotten her question amid the flurry of his own that she could see swirling in his eyes- though what they were about, she could not say.

"Hm? Oh, sorry, Mother. Guess I've just got a lot on my mind." He was looking out the window again, and she seen a shadow pass over his eyes for a second. A little yellow warning flag shot up in her head as she seen this, knowing haven seen it once before that it usually meant he was in trouble with somebody.

"Did you and your friend get into a fight again?" She asked as delicately as she could as he turned back to the stove and flicked it of with a gracefull turn if his wrist. He pretended to go about his business with intent, but she could still sense the turmoil in his mind. He liked to do that, though- pretend everything was fine in front of her, even when she knew he was ready to fall apart.

"No. Actually, me and Hiei have been getting along better than we normally do." He replied with a soft smile as he rushed around the kitchen to finish preparing the meal. Shiori smiled alongside him, recalling that they had had a nasty little spat just a few months ago...something to do with Hiei's work getting involved with his love life and him getting in trouble for it before turning the blame onto Shuuichi. She recalled it clearly, for it had happened in her house, just upstairs where Shuuichi was once more staying.

His step father had passed away shortly before then, and being the worry-wort he was, Shuuichi had offered to move back in with her to help pay for utilities. He said he worked part-time at the university as a teaching aide, but Shiori had never seen him there when she had bothered to visit on her well-days; not that she didn't believe him with the salary he brought home every week. Her heart had begun to have some problems just last year, giving her red-head another incentive to move back in. He helped her keep tabs on her medicine, and generally tried to spoil her rotten, though she protested much of the time out of some sense of motherly pride. After all, if anything she should have been the one spoiling him, not the other way around. But Shuuichi had never really liked to be spoiled or coddled, so she frequently refrained except when he was sick, which wasn't very often.

"Actually..." Shuuichi's voice brought her back from her own thoughts instantly as she listened carefully to the sound of his voice. Shuuichi was a masterful liar, she knew. She knew too well he could lie through his teeth like it was as easy as breathing if he felt the need to. She couldn't say she really understood where her sense about that had come from, or when, but after raising the boy, she supposed she should know by now what at least some of his tells were- one of which could be heard more than seen if one listened closely enough to the way his voice rolled off his vocal chords. Her heart might not be in the best condition, but her ears worked just fine enough to hear the difference in the clarity and pitch of his voice when he was trying to hide something versus when he was being more honest.

"...It's Yusuke I'm worried about." He exhaled, brow furrowing a tiny bit as he closed his eyes, standing with his hands against the kitchen counter. His body was turned away from her, indicating he'd rather not talk about it, but she insisted this time as a measure of caution.

"Is he alright?" She inquired, concerned. Not much went wrong with that child despite his upbringing, at least not that she'd been clued in on. She'd met the spunky kid once, and he seemed to be able to take care of himself surprisingly well, considering he lived with just his girlfriend now. So to hear his name in this situation most certainly drew up her concern.

"He...well, rather..."

Suddenly the phone rang, and Shiori did not miss the jolt Shuuichi gave at the noise, try as he might to suppress it. She had given a jump of her own at the sound, but it was rare to see Shuuichi flinch at things like that. He'd always had this uncanny awareness of his surroundings that seemed to make him immune to being startled, as his younger brother had learned the hard way trying time and time again to pop up and scare him. Rather, it was always Shuuichi who wound up scaring the pants off his younger sibling, usually unintentionally, as he frequently walked into a room like a ghost. Shiori had gotten used to it after twenty three years, her son's admittedly eerily silent and graceful way of walking and moving in general, but it still managed to freak out the Younger Shuichi from time to time when he was caught off guard.

Shiori moved out of the way as her son made to grab the phone more hastily than she'd of expected, had he not just told her he was worried about his friend. She had her questions about her son's...unusual, choice of friends, but kept them to herself, if for no other reason than not to seem rude. Still, the Hiei boy that her son had taken up as a lover (she'd yet to confront him about her knowledge of that, she reminded herself, making a mental note to bring it up when the time decided it) worried her a lot more than she would ever probably openly admit, though she'd asked questions about him after they'd been formally introduced a year and a half ago.

"Hello?" She heard Shuuichi answer hastily, listening tensely into the silence that followed. She allowed herself to poke her head around to see Shuuichi as he stood by the phone, mounted on the wall near the kitchen threshold in which she presently stood. She watched him warily, knowing he typically acted differently if he knew she was watching him, the way most children did. The fact Shuuichi had been more of an adult his entire life than most people at any point in theirs didn't exclude him from that one reliable law of parenting: Your child will never act the same way with you they do with their friends or coworkers, even after they grow up. In this case though, Shuuichi took a nearly backwards approach. Rather than feel more at ease around her, even in situations you might expect such a thing to happen, like now, as she watched him fidget with the phone chord absently, he instead became more guarded. She supposed she could understand that, though; she'd never personally reinforced it, but he was praised highly in parts of her neighborhood as the perfect child, since there was never any rumors that he'd ever gotten in trouble, and it had affected him, she could suppose, in the way that he was afraid to seem weak or unreliable in her eyes. Then again, there were those in the neighborhood that seen his pristine record and made trouble out of it for themselves from time to time, so maybe he'd just become guarded as a side effect of that. She couldn't tell, and doubted he'd give her an honest answer if she asked.

Shiori was pulled from her thoughts by her intuition. She looked over at Shuuichi, seeing him standing there stiff as a board, his face pale as a linen sheet. Her gut immediately clenched in apprehension, making her frail heart accelerate. She tried to keep her anxiety at bay in light of her health, but had to admit that seeing such an expression of fright on her own child was a first for her, and that it scared her equally as much.

"I understand." Shuuichi replied into the phone in a soft but clipped voice, making Shiori even more anxious. "I'll be there. Do you...should I bring anything?" There was muffled noise on the other end. "Yusuke." The way Shuuichi said the name, as well as the name itself, made Shiori tense. He'd said his friend's name in a way she couldn't exactly describe; it was partly commanding, partly comforting. Once more her intuition told her that Shuuichi would probably be missing dinner tonight, based on the sound of that tone alone.

"Yusuke, breathe, okay? I'll...Let me get Hiei, and we'll be right there. Hm? I have a car, Yusuke. I can get to the hospital, okay?...Yusuke?" The warningly concerned tone in her son's voice and the fact he'd mentioned a hospital made Shiori exit her position in the doorway to come up beside Shuuichi.

"Is everything alright?" She said with more alarm than she'd intended. "I can take someone to the hospital if they need it. Is Yusuke alright?" Shiori asked as her son hung up the phone with a careful motion that told her he was more upset than he would let on.

"I...I think Yusuke will be fine, as long as me and Hiei can talk to him." Shiori's pulse, rather than be soothed by this, only increased. The way this was sounding to her...

"Who got hurt?" Shuuichi looked up at her from where his eyes had been averting hers on the ground, noticing how shook she seemed to be.

"Mother, everything will be okay-"

"Who got hurt?" She insisted, worry making her tone firm but not quite demanding. He got the gyst though, and sighed.

"Keiko got...well, there was an accident. Yusuke's really shaken up, and...well, I'm not really sure how to help him yet. But Hiei should be able to help him with this kind of thing, so I should probably call him..." Once more he peered into her eyes, sighing before forcing his features to relax. As much as Shiori hated it when he did that, masked his emotions, she had to admit that it calmed her down.

"Mother, you should sit down. Your heart is in no condition-"

"My heart is fine, dearest." Shiori snapped a little, and almost regretted it when it seemed to take Shuuichi aback. Almost. "I can drive to the hospital if you need me to. How bad was the accident?" At the harrowed look her son gave her, she swallowed.

"She's being taken in an ambulance as we speak; it was Yusuke who asked for a ride there to...be with her. But frankly, I don't think it's a good idea he's with her right now, being as shaken as he is...I also don't think it would be good for you to be there either. Your heart doesn't need that kind of stress. Besides, apparently it was a...messy, accident." At the look of alarm that bordered on panic that crossed Shiori's features, her son retracted and started over. "That is to say, she got hurt pretty badly. But I'm not going to be around that too much, just going to meet Yusuke nearby and help him get cleaned up and calmed down is all, so you really shouldn't worry too much. Besides, Hiei will be there too, if I can get a hold of him, and maybe I'll call Kuwabara as well." At the persistent look of worry that lingered on her face, Kurama changed tactics. "Look, I really don't think it's a good idea he's alone right now, and since he called me first..." Shiori nodded in understanding.

"I understand dear. I'll pack dinner for when you return. Just make sure you take your cell and keep in touch with me, okay?" Shiori smiled gently, placing a dainty hand on her son's arm comfortingly. "If something goes wrong or...or you get scared, call me. I'll be up a while; take my car if you're going anywhere else. I just filled it yesterday."

"Mine will be fine, Mother; stop worrying. I'll come straight home if anything happens, okay?" He grasped her hands lightly, trying to soothe her mind and heart.

"Ok, dear. Be safe." She said as he pulled his cell off the counter and dialed a number, grabbing his other things before walking out the door, phone pressed to his ear.

 _'I hope Yusuke will be alright.'_

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 **Alright, alright! Well, this got off to a nice start, no? I think so. Much better than last time, anyway.**

 **Okay, so to let those know who don't; As a general rule of my fanfictions, I will only post a new chapter if someone REVIEWS the posted one. This has nothing really to do with hubris or wanting the reveiw (though I lOVE feedback, love, love, love, as any author might, be it good or bad), it just helps me to gauge how much demand there is for my fics. Some, like my crossover, have a TON of demand, and others, like my little standalone Hellsing fic, not so much. Point is, More demand= faster updates. So, with that in mind, REVIEW for more in this slightly twisted tale of slowmance.**

 **until then, Aufweidersehen!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Okay, well that went better than expected. Props to my reviewer for making this chappie happen.**

 **Yes, I will get around to updating The Silent Moon, but my mind is being quite fickle about where to go from the last point. In short- *shudder* it's Writers Block. SO until I work the block out of my system, it shall remain cliffy and unfinished. Apologies to any of my followers for that.**

 **Onward!**

 **WARNINGS: Angst, blood, possible OOC-ness, and some breif allusory gore. Read at your own peril.**

 **ALSO: Since I forgot last time:**

 **DISCLAIMER: I own nada. All rights go to Togashi, and I make no profit from this- If I did, I wouldn't be contemplating which organ I should sell to pay for school. -,- This disclaimer will only appear ONCE so get your fix now.**

 **With that out of the way- Ontowards!**

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 **CH II**

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After calling Hiei three times, the fire brat showed up conspicuously at Kurama's house, the way he usually did whenever he was in the area and the fox tried calling him. Hiei carried a cell on him per his companion's insistance should he need to contact him more immediately, but if he wasn't in another dimension, he usually just showed up rather than actually answering his phone.

"You called?" Hiei drawled lazily where he perched atop Kurama's car. As stated, conspicuous.

"Yususke...There's been an accident involving Keiko." At this, the fire demon's posture became more rigid and his crimson eyes came to sharp attention.

"What kind of accident?"

"The kind we feared would happen, I'm afraid." Kurama breathed lowly, head tipping to the ground as his hair fell like a veil over his eyes. There was a long silence before Hiei jumped soundlessly off the car, coming beside the fox.

"Is she alive?" He asked shamelessly, as always.

"Yes, for now- but her wounds sounded to be quite grave." Kurama explained, bringing his eyes back up to meet those of his companion, the emotion in them carefully concealed with a firm but not yet steely gaze.

"I see. So it really got the better of him, then?"

"Yes, unfortunately. Now I've called you here-"

"Let me guess, you want me to talk to him?" Hiei sassed.

"Yes, in fact, I do. My days of being a predator are long behind me. But you still have those instincts, those impulses- more often than I do, in any case. Besides, I have a hunch that you'll be able to get through to him better right now."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You'll see. Come on- I told mother I was taking the car, so get in." Kurama said snappishly.

"Commanding as ever, fox." Hiei rolled his eyes, but obeyed, hopping into the passenger seat as Kurama started the car. It was the last gift he'd ever recieved from his late step-father; an older modeled Porsche, used, of course, but still in good shape. He'd saved for years to be able to buy it for his other son, but Kurama reached driving age first and had gotten it as a present for his birthday. He still preferred to get places the old fashioned way, as did Hiei, but in times like this it payed to blend in a bit more. Besides which, Hiei had already had the fight with Kurama about riding in the damn contraption; a fight he begrudgingly admitted he'd lost- hook, line, and sinker.

As they drove over to Yusuke's flat, Kurama abruptly stopped the car, interrupting Hiei's rare daydreams as he stared out the window.

"What-" Hiei was about to protest, but was distracted by a too familiar head of orange, poofy hair passing in front of Kurama's window as the fox rolled it down.

"Hey guys!" Hiei could have puked right then, and nearly opened his mouth to allow the word-vomit (consisting mostly of insults and rude comments, as usual) to escape, but Kurama interrupted before he could get that far.

"Kuwabara! I was thinking of coming to get you, actually- listen, there's been an...accident, at Yusuke's house." Kuwabara's smiling face twisted instantly into an expression of alarm. "He's really shaken; I'm bringing Hiei to try and talk to him, but if he can't get through to him, maybe you could." Hiei threw a strange stare at his companion, brow quirking.

"Are you sure bringing a _human_ there is such a good idea right now, Kurama?" Hiei asked incredulously. "Even if nothing goes wrong, he's liable to faint."

"I don't think her injuries were quite that severe, Hiei, or she'd of died of shock before the paramedics could even arrive. Still..." He looked over at Kuwabara's concerned expression with one of his own, swallowing visibly. "Kuwabara-"

"No, I'll go. I don't care how bad it is, if Yusuke needs my help..." A shadow flew across the expanse of Kuwabara's eyes. Kurama nodded, knowing there was no sense in trying to change his mind now.

"Get in. I'll explain more on the way."

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The car stopped in front of Yusuke's apartment complex, where police were still buzzing around, talking to each other in hushed notes and documenting things that were reported, likely from an investigation team inside. The sight of them made Kurama automatically tense in apprehension, firstly because they were police, and even if the logical fact he'd never been apprehended by human police stuck in his mind like stubborn glue, the water that made up his memory and experience always flowed right over it, making him slightly uncomfortable with such authority figures. But what made him especially uneasy now was the fact that it meant Yusuke was likely being investigated for a crime in light of this incident, and if she died...

If she died, he'd be charged with murder.

"I sure as hell hope the detective managed to get out of there. Combine his unstable state right now with his aversion to police..." Hiei muttered uncharacteristically.

"He said he was in a different flat, one that had been closed own for renevation...but the fact he's still in the building is in itself troubling. We all know how he can get when he's upset...any more reason for the police to suspect him is reason he doesn't need." Kurama stated, his car-mate's nodding in agreement.

"How will we find him?" Kuwabara said, and Kurama did not miss the waver in his voice. He'd recently been given a lot of information; now Kurama really was concerned the human would faint, with his complexion being as ghostly as it was in that instance.

"Kuwabara, maybe you should-"

"No. I'm not leaving Yusuke to deal with this alone. He's probably so scared of himself right now...I know it's probably really dangerous, but I don't care! Demon or not, he's my friend, and don't you think for a minute I wouldn't be willing to do the same with you guys if you ever...y'know...uh..."

"Lost it?" Hiei supplied sarcastically.

"Yeah, that." Kurama took a deep, steadying breath.

"Alright, but we shouldn't go in without a strategy. I don't know what he'll be like in there, but he sounded very shaken on the phone...and I think it's safe to say that Yusuke is a hard person to shake. Nonetheless, we'll need a plan."

"And if the plan is either useless, or worse, moot, then what?"

"Then we improvise. But I'm pretty sure this will work if we all do what we're supposed to. Just remember one thing."

"What?" Kuwabara asked, swallowing his nerves as they threatened to creep up his throat.

"The Yusuke in there may not be the one any of us recognize."

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They all found the flat Yusuke was in with some ease, courtesy Hiei's third eye and Kuwabara's spiritual awareness. Kurama paused at the door, which had plastic wrap on it to indicate it's state of reconstruction. He lifted his hand to halt those behind him, his eyes pinned to the bottom of the door.

"What is it?" Kuwabara whispered, confused. He knew they were supposed to be subtle, but this was ridiculous. Kurama indicated with his raised hand to follow his line of sight. Kuwabara gazed at the fox's eyes first, seeing a hard, cold, but also slightly curious expression in those emerald orbs. He followed his line of sight cautiously-

And nearly retched when he seen a splatter of darkening blood on the plastic.

"Either he was wounded somehow, or he did more damage than I anticipated." Kurama muttered factually, causing Kuwabara to gawk at his companion's chill.

"Um, hate to point out the obvious, but it kind of takes a lot of blood to do that kind of thing, doesn't it?"

"Yes, it does." Kurama looked up at the door handle, also finding it tinted crimson.

"It was on his hands...Maybe..." Kurama shook his head, clearing his thoughts before grasping the handle firmly, noting that the blood was spread thinly enough on it's surface that most of it had dried, making the brass handle feel powdery and rough beneath his hand.

"Remeber the plan. Quiet but not silent. We want him to know we are here, but we don't want to startle him. There's no telling what kind of state he's in right now," Kurama glanced over at Kuwabara as he said this, a silent warning to stay alert. "So we all stick together and tread with caution."

"Agreed." Hiei said, nodding. Kuwabara also nodded, swallowing a nervous lump in his throat for the umteenth time that evening.

Kurama turned the handle hard enough to make it click, but slowly, so as not to create too much of a disturbance. He opened it warily, ducking his head inside to check the area. It was dark inside, not a single light turned on. Kurama reached for the switch, thinking maybe just turning on the lights would be a good way to indicate their presence, but upon flicking it discovered that they had shut off power to the flat while it was being renovated.

"It'll be dark, so watch yourselves. Kuwabara, Hiei, you two stick close. Hiei can see in the dark, and you can sense which room he's in- if he doesn't decide to conceal his energy."

"Fine. But I'm only working with him for Yusuke's benefit." Hiei huffed.

"Um, what about you?" Kuwabara inquired worriedly.

"I'll be fine. My reaction time is usually fast enough to dodge him, and besides, you two will be right behind me, right?" Kurama glance over his shoulder at Hiei, his eyes stern with an unspoken warning.

"Yeah, whatever you say, fox." Hiei sighed irritably. Had it been any other situation, he might've bucked, but Yusuke's sanity- and possibly his life- were at stake here.

"Let's go. Tread carefully- even in this dim light, I can see the blood on the floor."

"I _so_ did not need to know that, man!" Kuwabara protested in a harsh whisper.

"Sorry." Kurama said unapologetically, voice low.

"He's in the far bedroom...master, I think." Kuwabara instructed, walking through the flat half-blind. He could sense Hiei and Kurama's energies beside and in front of him, using their superior night vision to guide him along, hoping he didn't step in any blood on the way, but knowing he probably would.

"Here?" Kurama indicated to a darkened halway where the master bedroom lie. Kuwabara could only half-see his gesture, but nodded, knowing the fox could probably see him just fine. They approached the door cautiously, Kurama slinking beside it as if expecting it to burst open.

"Remember, caution." The fox whispered. Kuwabara's heart was racing so hard he felt it might burst from his chest, but nodded the ancient demon's way in confirmation. He could never remember being this afraid of a demon before- but then, he'd never known one as personally as he did Yusuke.

Kurama opened the door, swinging it open slowly. Peering inside, he motioned for them to follow him, treading lightly but not silently, despite the fact Kuwabara knew he could creep like a shadow if he really wanted to. Suddenly, there was a soft rustling noise from the far corner of the room, and a police car pulling up to the building illuminated the room in a dim half-light that cast a silhouette against the darkness, curled up in a corner of the empty room, faint streaks on the otherwise pristine floor revealing the precise path he'd taken into the room, marking the narrow strip in front of the window where he'd paced and now probably staining the floor where he sat. They all halted at the noise, wary.

"Hey, Kurama." A soft, vacant whisper broke the uneasy silence after a while, making the fox and Hiei at least, relax a little. Kuwabara, on the other hand, went even more rigid; there was something about his voice that didn't sound right. Kuwabara tenatively reached out with his spirit awareness, only to immediately get a chill up his spine, not from his friend's energy- that, somewhat thankfully, was normal, indicating he wasn't possessed or something - no, it was a different sense entirely that creeped him out. In the half-light, he couldn't see Yusuke's face or his eyes, but he _knew_ somehow they were on _him_.

"Y-Yusuke?" Kuwabara offered, swallowing thickly. He held up his hands in a placating gesture, prepared to back away if he had to. He'd never be called a coward, but he knew there were limits, and that Yusuke had already gone above and beyond his own...

"Why is he here?" The question was simple; simply given, simply uttered. But it was it's very simplicity, it's emotional vacancy, that had Kuwabara's gut clenching with worry.

"I asked to be here," Kuwabara replied, still feeling more than seeing his friend's gaze tearing a hole through his forehead. "I-I wanted to be sure you were okay. You're still my friend, after all. Isn't that what we're supposed to do for each other, anyway? Be there when we need each other?" A long, pregnant silence followed.

"I am confident you don't need someone like me."

"Nonsense, Urameshi!" Kuwabara kept his voice quiet, which surprised even himself. "You're my best friend! You-"

"You know what happened, don't you?" Yusuke snapped suddenly, but the anger in it was gone as fast as it came. Once more a long silence followed.

"Y-yeah, kind of," Kuwabara swallowed hard against the lump forming in his throat. "I mean, these guys weren't too big on details, but...but I think I get it." Kuwabara fought to keep his voice even, and obviously failed, if the flash of white in the dark was any indication.

"Do I _scare_ you?" Yusuke said sarcastically, a toothy grin on his face. But there was no humour- in fact, it made him look like a beast. It made all persons in the room stiffen up with unease as they regarded their friend warily.

"Yusuke?" Kurama asked, cautious.

"I'm fine. I'm...here." The way Yusuke said that made Kuwabara's brow quirk, but he kept his mouth shut for now, not trusting it not to waver.

"Yusuke...I hate to be the one to point this out, but you can't stay here forever. There are police in the building, they'll follow the blood here eventually." Kurama instantly regretted saying that when he seen his friend flinch. "Look, Yusuke, we can work this out. But first you have to leave here. I think we can both agree that if the police found you right now, it would not mean good things for any of us." At Yusuke's silence, the fox continued prompting. "Please, Yusuke." Kurama moved quietly over to the silhouette, kneeling in front of him. He did not miss the way Yusuke reeled from him, but ignored it tactically.

"Please. We need to leave here. I've already got a place set up nearby; we'll be totally alone there, and then we can talk this over, okay?" Again he was met with silence.

"Yusuke?" A dry, humorless laugh echoed softly in the large room.

"Somehow, fox, I don't think talking will fix this mess. Not this time." There was a crack in his voice toward the end, and Kurama felt a stab of pity for his friend.

"Maybe not." Kurama agreed, making all eyes turn on him. "But we'll figure it out together, okay? Remember, I'm a demon too. I...I know how you're feeling, better than you know, but this is not the place to discuss that. We have to go, Yusuke. Or there will be even more hell to pay than I think even you deserve." The fox smiled charmingly at his companion, who stirred from his position on the floor, his gentle coercion working it's magic.

"A...Alright. But..."

"Yes?" Kurama answered patiently.

"But keep Kuwabara away from me." The comment stung the man in question for a second, but Kuwabara relaxed as much as he was able after recalling the information he'd been given in the car.

Apparently, Yusuke had been having...episodes, lately, where his human and demon sides didn't get along or something like that, and as a result he lost himself out to impulses and urges that he wouldn't normally. Yusuke didn't have the best impulse control to begin with, as Kurama had pointed out many times, but the impulses he was having now that his demon blood had been awakened were sometimes more dangerous, so was the discussion in the car. Yusuke's accident with Keiko had really been an accident, but though Kuwabara hadn't been told anything shy of that, he was slowly beginning to form a mental image of what Yusuke might've tried to do to her.

"I think we can manage that." Kurama said after a time, and it was only then that Kuwabara realised the fox had been staring at him expectantly. Blushing a bit, he nodded, still not trusting his voice. Kurama nodded back before turning again to Yusuke and offering his dainty hand to the former detective, who, after a long, uncertain moment, decided to take it, letting the old fox haul him up with surprising ease for such a delicate creature. "Come on. Hiei is here too, if it's any comfort." Yusuke said nothing, allowing the fox to place a guiding hand on his shoulder despite the fact they both knew Yusuke could see just fine in this light. The former Detective looked over at Hiei, who stood there with an impassive expression, regarding Yusuke in like.

"Actually, I think it is." Yusuke whispered after a moment of looking the fire demon over before glancing at Kuwabara breifly. Hiei's expression changed to one of surprise, not expecting the praise, if you could call it that.

"Come. We can get out the back. I don't think there's any police back there yet."

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The gang reconveined at a nearby park, retreating into a more wooded area of the grounds so as to avoid eavesdroppers as much as was possible, not that the park was all that busy after dark anyway. Kuwabara trailed along behind the group, intentionally putting some distance between himself and Yusuke, for his friend's comfort as well as his own.

Once Yusuke had come into the light and Kuwabara had been able to see his face, the human had come very close to losing his stomach, and true to what Hiei had predicted, nearly fainted from stress. He'd been given a vague answer about Yusuke's "episodes" and had slowly been forming a mental image of what Yusuke might've done to hurt Keiko- maybe he'd gotten angry and hit her, maybe he just freaked out and scratched her or something like that. That's the sort of thing he'd been expecting; after all, Yusuke obviously had had blood on his hands, (literally) so it was a pretty logical conclusion to make, right?

That all flew out the window when he seen the blood on his friend's face.

That small detail - or, really not, considering that more of his face than not had been covered in drying blood upon walking into the light - changed everything about the situation. It suggested something, something so severe and unreal that even though Kuwabara naturally wanted to take his friend's side, consciously supporting the idea that maybe she'd fought back and it was actually _his_ blood, not hers, or at least the notion that he'd only bitten her and nothing else; somewhere in the back of his mind, in a place that was both out of sight but not ignorable for the noise it made presently- in that recess of his mind, he knew.

He knew Yusuke had tried to _eat_ her.

"You okay, Kuwabara?" Kurama voiced, concerned as they stopped in the deepest part of the most densely wooded area of the park, trying for secrecy. Kuwabara stayed some six trees behind them, keeping a suspicious distance even for the request of his friend.

"Oh, me? I'm okay. Just..."

"Feeling ill?" Hiei mocked. He was expecting a sharp rebuttal, as usual, but to his surprise Kuwabara's skin only paled further, making him look more ghastly than a ghost. The human seriously looked like he was on the verge of having a nervous breakdown, puking, or simply fainting. Possibly all three.

"You don't have to be here, you know." Kurama offered gently. "I know you want to be for Yusuke, but...maybe it's better if you go home. Give you some time to proccess all of this, alright? I mean, you did get tossed into this mess kind of abruptly." Kurama offered him a reassuring smile, and for a moment Kuwabara had to wonder where his friend got his resolve from, before recalling that he was _also_ a demon. A very _old_ demon at that. Swallowing against the acid surging up his throat, Kuwabara only nodded. He was in no state to help Yusuke like this, even he could admit that. And as usual, the fox made a good point about him being given a lot to process.

"Just...keep me up to date, okay? I...I got some questions, but I think I can wait to ask until I think over them some more. I...I guess I'll see you guy's around, huh?" Kuwabara tried for the best smile he could manage, and didn't even pretend to miss the harrowed look he seen in Yusuke's eyes as he watched him leave, as if he was both saddened and pleased that he was going. He gave the ex-detective one last glance, conveying with his eyes to the best of his ability the breadth of his sympathy and sadness he had for his friend's misfortune before turning away without a second glance, going home to ponder things and digest the new reality he might be facing in the near future.

Kurama watched Kuwabara leave, feeling unsettled by the human's reaction, but expecting it nontheless. He hadn't expected Kuwabara to catch on so fast; but then, the man had a habit of surprising him like that.

"Thank you," Yusuke whispered solemnly, eyes downcast. Kurama's human heart ached relentlessly in his chest, uncertain and somewhat frightened for Yusuke. Koenma would have to know about this- there was no escaping that. Furthermore, the only people immediately close to Yusuke that could defeat him if necessary was himself and Hiei. The fox didn't mind guard duty, if Koenma seen it fit to push it that far over one incident (he could certainly be melodramatic at times) he couldn't say that Yusuke would benefit from the experience at all. Being caught and shoved in a cage was the last thing Yusuke needed right now, but it would be precisely what Koenma would do if Yusuke was deemed a large enough threat; and given his overall power...

"Yusuke...Here," Kurama reached into his breast pocket, for he always made sure he had one even if he had to sew it in, and drew out a small roll of bandaging he kept on him for when the creeps on the street just didn't seem to understand the word "no". The cloth was soft but sterile, and rough enough to be used as a cleaning cloth if necessary- yet another reason he carried it on him. He broke off a sizable strip, wrapping it up before borrowing some of the dew settling on the grass to dampen it. He handed it to Yusuke, who only gazed at it with a sad uncertainty.

"You'll need to clean up at least a little. If someone sees you looking like that, it's bound to attract unwanted attention." Kurama prompted. "It won't do much since it's just water, but it should at least dissuade the notion that you are fatally wounded." Yusuke looked up at Kurama then, confusion swimming in his glassy eyes before understanding crashed over him visibly, making him once more bow his head as if in shame. It likely _was_ from shame.

"Thanks." He offered weakly, taking the cloth gently. His movements were careful, controlled, as if he didn't trust his own strength.

He probably didn't.

Yusuke scratched the cloth over his hands breifly before scrubbing it over his face, each pass becoming rougher until it had to have hurt. Kurama ignored the rough way he treated himself for now, partly knowing that if he commented on it the ex-detective would probably blow up, and also realizing that blood was extremely difficult to wash off of skin with only water, and thusly that some of the rough scrubbing was actually required. Once he was seemingly satisfied, Yusuke handed the now soiled cloth back to Kurama, purposefully avoiding looking at it. Kurama let out a breath that would have been a sigh had Yusuke not been in such a shaken state, feeling pity for his friend. He could empathize to some degree, but in the behaviors, so obviously shameful and afraid, he could not say he'd ever taken part. It was in his nature to conceal as much of his pain, physical and emotional, as possible; as far as he'd come as a human, his patience for those that drowned themselves in sorrow was still fairly thin, and he felt the stirrings of agitation flutter like a plume of feathers as he patiently waited for the proper cue, wracking his brain to find more tactful words than those he was presently thinking. In matters like this, with anyone else, he might have just come out and said what was on his mind, regardless of how insensitive the other person took it to be; but Yusuke's mental and emotional states were still too fresh off the sharp rocks and riptides to be subjected to anything that could be perceived as criticism or taunting - not from him, at least. That's why Hiei was here - Yusuke expected Hiei to be ciritical and uncaring, and would probably not take half as much offense as if Kurama had said the same kinds of things, even if he thought them.

"Hate to break the silence," Hiei said dryly, exchanging glances at both of them. "But I really have better things to do than stand here all night." There was a tense pause.

"Yusuke," Kurama began, taking Hiei's interjection as the proper cue, seeing as Yusuke had no obvious reaction to it. "I realize you're still shaken up, but in order to be of any help, I have to know what happened. Precisely." Kurama said as gently as he could. A thought popped into his head then. "If you want to we can go to Genkai's. The woods there are private, and so is most of the house since it's only Yukina and Genkai. It might be more...comfortable, than this place, anyway." Kurama flinched when a rather cold drop of water plopped onto his scalp, resisting the reflex to shake his hair out.

"He's right, Yusuke." Hiei agreed. "Besides which, if any human can hold her own against you, it's that old badger." There was another lengthly, pregnant pause before Yusuke nodded, still offering no verbal reply.

"Come, then; we'll head to Genkai's place. Your choice where you sit." Kurama shrugged as he began to hastily walk back to his car, rain beginning to patter on the ground around them. He realised his actions seemed callous, with the way he was effectively ignoring the bigger picture, but his cool head was what Yusuke would be looking for right now; something stable to cling to and depend on when the rest of his world was changing. Kurama had already become the ex-detectives stable rock, in a sense, due to the occurance of these episodes. No, he corrected himself, he'd been the stable rock for longer than that; the person Yusuke, and even Kuwabara turned to when things became too hard for them to swallow or when they needed a logical answer to a sentimental problem. He couldn't say he minded the role, except where Hiei was concerned, but their relationship was a little...different.

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 **In the interests of moving things along, I shall stop there.**

 **Remember to REVIEW for the next chapter!**

 **Ja-ne!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Sorry for the long absence! Been a busy time for me. But I've recently picked this fic back up, so we shall be going on with it as planned. Things are about to get interestingly angsty, so mind your heads.**

 **WARNING: Some serious angst ahead. Mentions of mutilation and implied gore. Oh, and did I mention this is rated M for a reason? Yeah. Might want to be mindful of that.**

 **Going on with a song to suit this chapter, this fic, and the Yusuke x Kurama ship. You're welcome.**

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 **CH III**

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 **First, From last time, because it was a while ago:** __ _"Come, then; we'll head to Genkai's place. Your choice where you sit." Kurama shrugged as he began to hastily walk back to his car, rain beginning to patter on the ground around them. He realised his actions seemed callous, with the way he was effectively ignoring the bigger picture, but his cool head was what Yusuke would be looking for right now; something stable to cling to and depend on when the rest of his world was changing. Kurama had already become the ex-detectives stable rock, in a sense, due to the occurance of these episodes. No, he corrected himself, he'd been the stable rock for longer than that; the person Yusuke, and even Kuwabara turned to when things became too hard for them to swallow or when they needed a logical answer to a sentimental problem. He couldn't say he minded the role, except where Hiei was concerned, but their relationship was a little...different._

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 _ **Familar Taste of Poison**_

 _By Halestorm_

 _'''_

 _"Drink the wine,_

 _My darling," you said,_

 _"Take your time,_

 _And consume all of it."_

 _But the roses,_

 _Were only to drain my inspiration;_

 _The promises,_

 _Were scorned before they left your lips and-_

 _'''_

 _I breathe you in again,_

 _Just to feel you -_

 _Underneath my skin,_

 _Holding onto_

 _The sweet escape -_

 _Is always laced with a_

 _Familar taste_

 _Of poison..._

 _..._

 _I tell myself_

 _That you're no good for me,_

 _I wish you well;_

 _But desire never leaves._

 _I could fight this 'till the end,_

 _But maybe I don't wanna win-_

 _'''_

 _I breathe you in again,_

 _Just to feel you -_

 _Underneath my skin_

 _Holding onto -_

 _The sweet escape_

 _Is always laced with a_

 _Familiar taste_

 _Of poison..._

 _'''_

 _I don't wanna be saved, I don't wanna be so polite,_

 _I want you on my mind,_

 _In my dreams, behind these eyes,_

 _And I wanna wake up,_

 _No, not this time..._

 _'''_

 _I breathe you in again_

 _Just to feel you -_

 _Underneath my skin_

 _Holding onto -_

 _The sweet escape_

 _Is always laced with a_

 _Familiar taste_

 _Of poison..._

 _A familair taste of poison..._

 _A familair taste_

 _Of poison..._

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Yusuke et al sat in an uneasy silence around the center table in one of the main areas of Genkai's temple, dripping dry from the trek up there. Genkai sat across from the three, sensing something unsaid hanging in the air like a phantom, and knowing that something had likely gone wrong, for them to be coming here at this time of night. She knew, of course, about Yusuke's episodes. In fact, she was one of the first people he'd turned to for help, which, of course, she couldn't give very much of. She wasn't a youkai, after all.

"So," Genkai uttered, breaking the tense silence like shattering glass, making Yusuke noticably jump. Not a good sign at all. "I presume there's a good reason why you three are at my temple at this hour of the evening?" Her jade eyes scanned over the three, settling on Yusuke at the center. Kurama, too, turned to look at Yusuke.

"I see." Genkai said, sipping her tea, which she'd had Yukina make the moment she'd sensed their incomming arrival. "How bad?" She asked simply, and didn't one bit like the grave look that passed over the old fox's face.

"It's bad." Kurama offered, keeping his voice low but clear. "Keiko is in critical care right now, and the police are probably looking for him."

"Keiko?" Yukina, who was busily tending to polishing a particular tea set behind Genkai, inquired worriedly. Yusuke seemed to withdraw then, as if wanting to curl in on himself. Genkai only looked on, surprised that it had escalated to the point of endangering human life. It had always been a possibility, she knew, but for Keiko to suffer...

"What happened?" She asked - more like demanded, if Yusuke were to judge - and he sighed at length, lifting his head wearily to look forlornly at the fox beside him. Genkai got a good look at his face then, for the first time since he came in, and her stomach sank. He had noticable amounts of dried blood stuck to his chin and jaw, though it was evident that he had tried to wash it off. There was no way defensive wounds had caused that kind of blood to appear on his face. Still, she stayed wisely silent, sensing more than seeing a disturbing amount of distress rolling off her pupil in waves.

"I...we..." Yusuke took a deep breath, and Kurama once more placed a supporting hand on his friend's back. He sighed again, finding his voice, as well as a new sense of calmness.

"We...Me and Keiko were just...just messing around, in our room. She started playing an' stuff, and...I don't know. Something...something went wrong." Yusuke said, sounding unsure of himself.

"Well, clearly, or you wouldn't be here right now." Genkai said, but it had no bite. Yusuke sighed again, hunting for words.

"I...I was kissing her, y'know, and...I don't know what came over me." At this, all eyes fell raptly on Yusuke, making him squirm.

"What happened?" Genkai promted again, leaning down to catch her student's eyes as they fell.

"I don't really know. I...I smelled her. I...I nipped her a little bit, and I smelled the blood...Something in me snapped. I don't really remember it...I just remember coming to and..." Yusuke's voice cracked with emotion he rarely showed. "She was bleedin' everywhere. There was blood on everything." He whispered, still shaken. " I didn't know what happened 'till I tasted her blood in my mouth..." He lifted his fists, pressing them to his temples as he did curl in on himself, letting his face fall into his lap. Kurama felt pity for his friend, who he could tell was struggling to keep it together.

"We're almost done, Yusuke." the fox offered. " We just need a little more information. You say you don't remember anything while it was happening, but what about before? Was there some kind of trigger, you think?" At this, Yusuke went rigid, hiding his face even more.

"Yusuke?"

"Can we talk about this later, Kurama? Please..." The old fox couldn't say no to his friend's uncharacteristic pleading. He sighed.

"Alright. Alright." He rubbed soothing circles over Yusuke's back, trying to calm him.

"You three can stay here tonight, if you like. I won't hold it against you. Just make sure you clean up after yourselves. You know the drill." Genkai said calmly, rising up. Yukina followed suit, taking the hint. They both left the three demons alone, and no sooner had they closed the door than Kurama jumped at the sound of his friend falling to pieces beneath his hand as he let out a single, choked sob.

Hiei watched Yusuke with an alarmed expression, not having ever really seen a human - much less a demon - cry before, and never having really expected Yusuke to be the type to do so to begin with. He glanced at Kurama with alarmed expression in place, to which he was effecively given a metaphorical boot, with Kurama indicating with his eyes that he should leave. Hiei had to huff. He didn't want to stick around to watch this anyway.

After Hiei vanished, Yusuke picked himself up a little, sniffling. Kurama watched on in mild discomfort, not knowing generally how to go about these things, since he rarely - _very_ rarely - had ever cried, as a human or otherwise. But he was the only one here now, and the only one Yusuke had left to turn to.

"Sorry..." Yusuke offered weakly.

"It's alright. I don't think anyone can blame you for not being able to handle this. I'd be pretty upset too, if, for example, I had woken up to find I'd tried to eat Hiei." Yusuke let out a snort at that, and Kurama ignored the tiny droplets he could see falling from Yusuke's hanging face from his periphery.

"I'd be more concerned about Hiei trying to eat _you_."

"You're honestly probably right, but still..." Kurama conceded, trying to bring up the mood. It served to distract him. A long silence followed, in which Kurama could feel beneath his hand the uneven breaths of his companion as he tried time and again to stifle his sobs.

"Yusuke..." Kurama whispered, feeling genuinely distressed over his friend's pain. Is this what compathy* was supposed to be?

His name being voiced like that was the last straw for Yusuke. He was down to two options - cry on Kurama's shoulder like a wuss, or ask him to leave and cry alone. Well, he'd already done the latter that day, so he could -

Ah, hell. Who was he kidding?

In a most unexpected move, Yusuke suddenly pulled himself up, and turned big, glassy, reddening eyes to the fox, a question buried within his dark irises. For once, the old demon didn't ponder long on an answer, instead opening his arms invitingly for Yusuke to come into, should he wish to. He normally wasn't one to do this - but then, neither of them seemed to be acting in character today.

Kurama sat there with Yusuke somewhat awkwardly crying on his shoulder, and found it in himself to put up with the contact, uncomfortable as he was with the emotions being displayed. Yusuke was his friend, and he was hurting right now. He needed someone, clearly, and Kurama was happy to provide any support he could - even if it made him cringe when Yusuke sniffled against his shirt, which was rapidly becoming soaked in salty-smelling tears. For Yusuke, though, it was worth it.

They sat like that for a time, Kurama wrapping his arms genlty around Yusuke's torso as the ex-detective hugged him, fists balling into the back of Kurama's shirt. Finally, Yusuke quieted down, though he didn't pull away for a time yet. Kurama was okay with this, realising that just because he'd stopped crying didn't mean that he was stable yet. He once more ran soothing circles over the Mazoku's back, a sense of contentment finding him out of nowhere as he supported Yusuke's weight against his shoulder, his discomfort absolving once Yusuke had stopped sobbing onto him. Even after spending so much time in the human world, the sound still seemed...unnatural, to him. Crying was almost purely a human phenomena - some demons felt grief, and surely felt sadness or depression, but few actually cried the way humans did. The sound of a human infant crying sent similar sensations of unease through him. They just weren't sounds that registered to him as familial. They belonged to something else, not his own kind, and that made it hard for him to find a heart with which to handle them sometimes - though he was getting better at it as his human life wore on.

"Sorry Kurama," Yusuke hiccupped against his shoulder. "I know this can't be pleasant for you to watch. Falling apart like some kinda wuss..." He drew a shaky breath, exhaling shortly against his friend's shirt.

"Think nothing of it, Yusuke. You're my friend. Sometimes...sometimes we need to help each other, even like this." He comforted, gently grasping Yusuke's shoulders to push him back. He withdrew willingly, looking up at Kurama's face with a blush on his own, clearly embarrassed by the ordeal. He averted his eyes quickly, tucking his face into his shoulder.

"Seriously, though. Thanks for this. It...means a lot, that you'd let me do this without..."

"Without criticizing you?" He offered, a small smile gracing his lips.

"Yeah, somethin' like that." Yusuke said, a tiny smile beginning to tug at the corners of his mouth. At least he wasn't crying now.

Kurama placed his hand on Yusuke's shoulder again, deliberately turning him to face him. Yusuke obliged by his unspoken request, but still kept his eyes averted. It was always funny to Kurama, that he behaved that way with him. Anyone else, he could challange, anyone else, he could fearlessly look in the eye and never blink- even Hiei. But for reasons the fox presumed not to be hubris about, the ex-detecive rarely met his eyes for longer than a second, and if he did, it was only when they were a part of a group and the atmosphere relaxed. In tense situations though, he could never recall Yusuke deliberately challanging him (though he'd been told off a few times). It made him want to smile, but he knew better. If becoming mortal had taught him anything, it was that he needed to second-guess himself more often, lest he revert back to some kind of pride-fueled power trip like he did in his old days. Dampening that train of thought, he switched gears back to Yusuke's predicament, almost dreading to say the words he knew he needed to say.

After all, they did say a true friend would tell you what you _needed_ to hear, not what you wanted- didn't they?

And if he became the bad guy for it...oh well. It wasn't like he hadn't been the villain before. "Yusuke," He said, calling his friend's attention. Yusuke looked up at him sadly, making the fox dread what he had to say even more.

"I know you don't want to hear this, but hear me out for a second. It's important." Yusuke swallowed thickly, eyes falling again as he nodded slowly.

"I realize this was just an accident, but you're in real danger from this incident, Yusuke." The ex-detective raised his head to look at Kurama inquisitively.

"Koenma has to know. There's no way around it- and if none of us tell him, he'll just find out on his own anyway. In fact, there's a possibility he already knows." Kurama warned gently, speaking softly, as though he were speaking to a frightened bird. A fitting analogy, if he were to be the judge of it.

"And what's pacifier breath gonna do? I mean, it's not like he could execute me- could he?" Yusuke was going to go on a tangent about it, but thought better by the grave expression on the older demon's face.

"I'm afraid I'm not sure what he'll do. You've endangered a human life- for any other demon, that would be cause for banishment back to the Makai. But since this wasn't an intentional attack, he may be more forgiving. Still..."

"Still?"

"...I fear he may still incarcerate you, somehow. In any event, you aren't likely to walk away from this scotch-free." Kurama explained, giving his friend a sympathetic look. Yusuke turned away from him then, elbows falling on his knees as he propped up his head on his hands. He still looked distressed, but wasn't as shaken as before.

"I know." he sighed, taking deep, calming breaths. "I don't know what I'm going to do." He whispered dejectedly, aura taking on a depressing tint again.

"Well, I for one propose some good sleep, to start with." Kurama offerred reassuringly, touching Yusuke's shoulder blade. "We can figure it out in the morning." When he didn't move, Kurama sighed.

"Brooding over it won't solve the problem, Yusuke." He hated being so blunt when his friend was clearly still upset, but when Yusuke got in a broody mood, it could last for days - and that wasn't time they had. "You need some sleep, or at least a long rest. I'll stay with you, if you feel like it would help."

"Nah. You're right - as usual." Yusuke huffed, standing up fluidly from his position. Kurama followed suit, keeping an eye on his companion. "You can leave the door between the rooms open if you want to, but I think I'm okay enough to manage on my own." Realizing too late how rude he sounded, he backtracked. "But I appreciate the offer, man."

"Anytime, Yusuke." Kurama offered Yusuke a soft smile, the effect working it's magic and making Yusuke's whole disposition right then lighten just a little.

Kurama knew, though, that he would have nightmares tonight, and probably for nights hereafter - thus, his offer to stay by him tonight - but he also realized that Yusuke was a proud man, and respected his wishes for at least some privacy. Coaxing a smile onto his face, he followed Yusuke through the house, mentally prepared to lose some sleep tonight as he pulled out his cell to call his mother.

 _'It's going to be a long night.'_

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 **WHOO! Update!**

 **I should be falling back into the rythm of this fic soon, since I am re-watching the series for the THIRD time. (I never get tired of it, to be honest.) I must apologize if Kurama seems a little...strange, here, but I have an honest belief that some 2,000 + years of bad habits aren't going to magically work themselves out in the span of 23 (Kurama's human age here). Just as reference for future chapters.**

 **Now my favorite thing to bug you with - ASTERISKS!**

 ***Compathy:** _A fancy word for a feeling most people have experienced, but which intellectual people like Kurama notoriously struggle with; it is a type of empathy known as compassionate empathy (thus, "compathy", a combination of compassion+empathy) in which another's emotions seem to integrate with your own, making you feel their feelings (most commonly pain or distress) as if they were your own._

 **Alright peoples, I hope you're still out there! And please, for the sake of measurement, Review for the next chapter...Please?**


	4. Chapter 4

**I AM SO SORRY THIS IS SO LATE!**

 **I've had this chapter out for a while now, but was being a pain and not telling me I had followers or reviews for this story! AGHHHH! I did not realize so many were waiting on a new update! GOMENASAI!**

 **Time to get on with this show!**

 **WARNINGS: Nightmares, Angst, Kurama being his foxy self. Nothing particularly gruesome.**

 **Onward, at long last!**

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 **CH IV**

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 _ **First, again, because it was a LONG time ago:**_

 _"Well, I for one propose some good sleep, to start with." Kurama offerred reassuringly, touching Yusuke's shoulder blade. "We can figure it out in the morning." When he didn't move, Kurama sighed._

 _"Brooding over it won't solve the problem, Yusuke." He hated being so blunt when his friend was clearly still upset, but when Yusuke got in a broody mood, it could last for days - and that wasn't time they had. "You need some sleep, or at least a long rest. I'll stay with you, if you feel like it would help."_

 _"Nah. You're right - as usual." Yusuke huffed, standing up fluidly from his position. Kurama followed suit, keeping an eye on his companion. "You can leave the door between the rooms open if you want to, but I think I'm okay enough to manage on my own." Realizing too late how rude he sounded, he backtracked. "But I appreciate the offer, man."_

 _"Anytime, Yusuke." Kurama offered Yusuke a soft smile, the effect working it's magic and making Yusuke's whole disposition right then lighten just a little._

 _Kurama knew, though, that he would have nightmares tonight, and probably for nights hereafter - thus, his offer to stay by him tonight - but he also realized that Yusuke was a proud man, and respected his wishes for at least some privacy. Coaxing a smile onto his face, he followed Yusuke through the house, mentally prepared to lose some sleep tonight as he pulled out his cell to call his mother._

 _'It's going to be a long night.'_

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Kurama had been right about his predictions, it seemed, as he awoke to the sound of a disgruntled noise coming from the other room. Yusuke had agreed to keep the shoji doors open, in case something went awry, and upon their threshold sat Hiei, who watched their friend sleep fitfully with an impassive look on his face. Kurama rolled over onto his stomach, watching Hiei cautiously.

"He's dreaming." Hiei said non-chalantly, a statement of the present state of things - but bearing a message of concern to only the fox's ears.

"Can you blame him, Hiei?" The reproachful look the fire demon threw him told Kurama that,yes, yes he could.

"You forget, Hiei. He was born and raised like a human - to him, this is all very frightening. He doesn't understand himself right now."

"I know that." Hiei snapped quietly. He sighed at length. "I know." He repeated, less bite in his tone. "But he's going to have to get over in quickly, or Koenma is going to lock him away. Be that with us, or in the spirit world, I don't know yet. But one way or another, he's going to have to be strong through this." Kurama could sense what was left unsaid there, nodding his head with a heavy sigh.

"And the only way he's going to do that is by leaning on me." Kurama finished, breathing deeply. "Though I feel like you are going to be just as instrumental in this as I am. You're _expected_ to be harsh. It doesn't sting as bad when you tell the ugly truths, because that's what your image is like. Mine, though..." Kurama quelled the feeling of irritation in his belly. "Before you mock me, yes, I am aware I did it to myself." The fox whispered tersely. "But I can't help it. A human body means a human brain. Human brain -"

"Means human feelings. You've explained this a few times, fox. No need to keep justifying yourself when I already know." Hiei rose from his position in the doorway, coming to sit beside Kurama at a comfortable distance - one of only centimeters, in their case.

"I wouldn't get so defensive if you didn't mock me for them as if I have a choice."

"I don't." Hiei defended himself. "I know you don't have any choice. You hardly let me forget." Kurama glared at his sass, putting him back in line as he sighed once more. "I only mock you for them when I feel like they are clouding your judgment or making your decisions for you."

"You're really going to pull the 'I do it for your benefit' thing on me?" Kurama laughed shortly. "I know you better than that."

"I mean it." Hiei defended. "After all, what good are you as a leader if you can't lead yourself?" Kurama paused to consider this.

"Me? Leader?"

"Don't play dumb with me, fox. I know you better than that." Hiei said, an amused twinkle in his eye at having subtly mocked the fox. "The only person here who doesn't realize who the real alpha of this rag-tag group is is the one sleeping fitfully over there." Hiei said, lowering his voice consciously.

"That might be so -"

"Which reminds me." Hiei interjected, stirring an annoyed sound from his companion. "Why do you do it? If you wanted to, you could easily put yourself at the top of this pile. Every other demon knows, can sense, the real social dynamics going on here. Yusuke is the only one dull and unaware enough not to see that."

"And your point is?" Kurama snapped, louder than he'd meant to. They both went dead silent as Yusuke's shuffling increased, thinking maybe he'd awoken. After what felt like forever in the unfulfilling silence following, Hiei thoughtfully replied, "My point, fox," Hiei said quietly, softly. "is that you have every opportunity set before you to be what you are best at being - a leader. An alpha, if you will. Yet, you let Yusuke run about like a little kid well past his years, oblivious to the social heirarchy which defines practically everything we demon's know." Hiei's voice grew more stern as he spoke - reminding Kurama uncomfortably, though somewhat proudly, of himself. "Don't you think that's rather dangerous?" Kurama pondered it a while in a much more comfortable silence.

"For now...for now, he's better off not knowing. He wouldn't trust me if he did. Yusuke hates authority figures. If I come out and put him in his place the way I do you, he would buck and fight me all the way. There'd never be any peace between us, even if it never came to physical blows. It's one of those situations in which I am better off leaving him alone. Besides..." Kurama turned in on himself a little as one of his major insecurities grabbed hold of his ankle like a vice, threatening him once again to drag him into the dark waters of his past. "I don't ever want to live like that again. Power hungry, careless, reckless - I've ruined myself once, Hiei." Kurama whispered softly. "I don't want to get carried away is all." Kurama said with a finishing air, letting Hiei know he wasn't going to be continuing the conversation. As if to accentuate his unspoken statement, he also laid back on his side, opening up the covers.

"Are you going to sleep here for a while, or...?" Hiei sighed dramatically, rolling his eyes in a similar fashion. This is what made it worthwhile to follow him. This is what made it worthwhile to stay at the fox's side like this. Because he was an...interesting kind of character.

 _'I never know what you are thinking, or what you will do next.'_ Hiei thought with a dark smile as he lay beside the fox, letting him spoon behind without complaint.

 _'Yes, indeed. I should think I would like to stay by your side a while longer, Kurama, if only that I might see how this new development pans out for you...and if you fall, if your unspoken, unbidden crown should fall, you know, as well as I, that I will be there to catch the both of you - though which I grasp onto first even I don't know yet.'_

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 **WHOO! Glad to get this up!**

 **I want to note something here -**

 **Hiei and Kurama's characters, as I am sure you've noticed, are a bit...colder, than they appear. There's a good reason for that, one that's not explained untill a LOT later. So I'll give you the run-down explanation now, just to clarify what's going on here.**

 **Demons...are not human. Their human forms are illusions, and their true natures are more animal than anything. Why, then, would they have human emotions?**

 **Kurama, as is implied, is an exception to this. He has a human body, a human brain - but a demon soul. That's a huge conflict of interest - humans are meant to feel a range of emotions. It's what lets them live cohesively and help each other. Demons inherently serve themselves - they don't have the same social structure as humans. Everything exists in a ladder - and often, demons are not above knocking each other down to claw their way to the top. Such is the way of the animal kingdom - such is the way they shall be here, and true to mythology as well.**

 **With that in mind, I'll let you imagine what sort of chaos will ensue between Kurama and Yusuke in the near future - and what will become of them and Koenma as well.**

 **Just a reminder, reviews (when FF lets me know there are any!) make me update faster.**

 **Until next time! :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Alright, alright, let's get this show on the road!**

 **Today's chapter is brought to you by a lovely little song that quite outlines the next few chapters.**

 **I apologize again for the poor schedule keeping, but I am taking an ASL class that is very time consuming; it requires far more practice than any other language I've learned (German, a half a year of French).**

 **With that said, let's try to get on with things, shall we?**

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 **CH V**

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 _ **Hardest of Hearts**_

 _by Florence + The Machine_

 _'''_

 _There is love in your body, but you can't hold it in,_

 _It pours from your eyes and it spills from your skin;_

 _The tenderest touch leaves the darkest of marks,_

 _And the kindest of kisses break the hardest of hearts..._

 _..._

 _(The hardest of hearts x3)_

…

 _There is love in your body, but you can't get it out,_

 _It gets stuck in your head, won't come out of your mouth;_

 _Sticks to your tongue and it shows on your face_

 _That the sweetest of words,_

 _Have the bitterest taste..._

 _'''_

 _Darling how I loved you from the start,_

 _But you'll never know what a fool I've been;_

 _Darling how I loved you from the start,_

 _But that's no excuse for the state I'm in –_

 _'''_

 _(the hardest of hearts x3)_

 _'''_

 _There is love in our bodies and it holds us together,_

 _But pulls us apart when we're holding each other;_

 _We all need something to hold in the night,_

 _We don't care if it hurts when we're holding too tight –_

 _'''_

 _There is love in your body, but you can't get it out,_

 _It gets stuck in your head, won't come out of your mouth;_

 _It sticks to your tongue and it shows on your face_

 _That the sweetest of words_

 _Have the bitterest taste –_

 _'''_

 _Darling how I loved you from the start,_

 _But you'll never know what a fool I've been;_

 _Darling how I loved you from the start,_

 _But that's no excuse for the state I'm in –_

 _'''_

 _(the hardest of hearts x3)_

 _'''_

 _My heart swells, like water at weight;_

 _Can't stop myself, before it's too late;_

 _Hold on to your heart, 'cause I'm coming to fight you –_

 _Hold on to your heart,_

 _'Cause I'm coming to break you..._

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Morning went without too much of a hitch – Yusuke was quieter than normal, but he moved around and ate breakfast in his typical fashion, grabbing something out of the fridge and stuffing it into his mouth without giving a glance to what he was eating. Normal Yusuke things.

However, Kurama could sense the turmoil he kept hidden behind the casual slope of his shoulders and nonchalant attitude. His silence said it all – not that anyone could blame him.

" Yusuke," Kurama grabbed his attention as he walked through the living room, presumably on his way to plop on the couch. It took him longer than usual to come out of this thoughts, but he eventually lifted his jaded eyes to meet the fox's emerald ones. He wasn't at all happy about what he seen, if the twisted expression on his face was any indication.

"Come with me." Kurama said simply, turning and walking out the door, headed for the room Genkai had situated herself in for the moment to come. He did not wait for Yusuke to follow, knowing he would find himself there either way. He would be lying, however, if he said he wasn't a little proud when Yusuke came stumbling down the hall after him with a shout.

"Hey, don't tell me to come with you and then just leave me like that!"

Opening the Shoji to one of Genkai's more private rooms located against the inner courtyard, it became apparent by way of the specially adapted TV in the center of the wall on one side what, exactly, Kurama had brought Yusuke here to do.

"I take it then that you contacted pacifier-breath this morning?" Yusuke asked bitterly.

"No," Genkai said, sipping on tea. "I did. There's no getting away from this, Yusuke. I can promise you that there is nowhere in the human world or even in the depths of Hell that Koenma can not reach you if need be; running away would only make your sentence worse anyway."

"Sentence?" Yusuke completely froze, skin paling a bit. "What are you talkin' about, Hag? I didn't do anything illegal, did I? It's not like I..." Yusuke looked to Kurama then with a dark light of panic in his eyes.

"Don't tell me..."

"No, Yusuke. Keiko is still very much alive." Kurama reassured, watching him breathe a deep sigh of relief. "However, you're an S class demon. If you were a lower class, it probably wouldn't be a big deal for you to have lashed out at her; at most, you might have to do a little community service, like me and Hiei did." Kurama explained. "However, as an S class demon, your power level and unstable mentality means that once you've begun endangering human life..."

"And you couldn't think to tell me this before, Kurama?!" Yusuke exclaimed. "No one told me I could go to spirit world jail for that shit! Hell, if someone had told me that, I probably would have been more careful about the kind of stuff I was doing!"

"Well, it's too late now, dimwit." Genkai snapped, turning on the telly. "You can't go back and change your mind. Whatever Koenma does to you is completely out of my hands." Genkai stopped, wanting to say more, but noticing Yusuke's skin go a shade whiter. He was scared.

" _Hello? Hello? Is this thing on?_ "Yusuke nearly jumped at the sound of Koenma's voice on the screen, whirling around to see the little toddler tapping the screen.

" _It's on, my lord._ " George replied in the background somewhere off-screen. Yusuke waited impatiently for Koenma to make himself presentable, just as unprepared as ever.

" _Yusuke. Front and center please._ " A wave of unease gripped his gut as he stepped in front of the screen; Koenma's "serious" voice didn't help.

"Yeah, what'd'ya want, Koenma?" Yusuke replied, though they both knew exactly why he was standing there.

" _Urameshi Yusuke, twenty two years old, S class demon..._ " Koenma read off an official looking document. " _You have endangered human life against the code...oh, well what matters is that you endangered the life of a human against the rules. You are not a documented human-eater; for you to attempt such a thing, even by accident, is a crime._ "

"Yeah, so I've been told. Now what are you going to do with me, toddler?" Yusuke snapped irritably, his unease transforming itself into a defensive kind of anger.

" _I'm not happier about this than you are, Yusuke._ " Koenma slowly removed the page from before his face, letting Yusuke see the melancholy expression he wore. " _But my job as ruler comes before my friendships; as much as I wish it wasn't so, Yusuke...I'm sorry._ "

"So what's my sentence?" Yusuke asked quietly, mentally prepared to handle whatever he dished out. Or, so he liked to think. Koenma heaved a heavy sigh.

" _Urameshi Yusuke."_ Koenma announced all official-like. " _Due to the nature of your actions – that is to say, because you did not intentionally injure Keiko, as well as taking into account your prior work for me, your sentence is far lighter than it would normally be. However, before you get your hopes up, know that this sentence, while fairly mild, is going to probably last a long time._ " He looked to Kurama tellingly, and the fox steeled himself for what he knew was to come, having also spoken with Koenma this morning with Genkai.

" _Yusuke, I, Koenma, hereby sentence you to twenty years probation in the human world; your probation officer will be none other than Kurama, and he will enforce the rules your restrictions place upon you – with lethal force, if necessary._ " Koenma lost most of his official-ness halfway through, grimacing as he said the last line. " _Should you break the rules again, or repeat your offense, the consequences will be far, far more dire. Now, I'm not supposed to tell you what exactly those consequences are, but because I regard you as a friend, I will make this one exception: should you break the rules, depending on which one, your sentence could increase in time or severity – likely the latter. In other words, the consequences could be as light as removing you from the human world until you can control yourself...or as severe as warranting your execution._ "

"But if you're going to send me off to the demon world if I do something wrong, then why bother keeping me here?" Koenma face-palmed.

" _Did you not just hear me! I said you could be killed if you do the wrong thing!_ "

"Yeah, I heard you, pacifier-breath. Now answer my question."

" _Fine, but listen to me, Yusuke; if you have to be executed, it will not be me or even Kurama who will do it, unless of course he has to._ " Once again he looked to Kurama. " _Let's just say that that is NOT a road I advise you to take. If that order is put into effect, it automatically goes out of my hands. I am not the only God, after all. While I do govern the spirit world, I do not decide who lives or dies directly, not with criminals; that is the job of others far higher up on the celestial hierarchy than me._ " Koenma sighed. " _And to answer your question, brat, I only narrowly managed to convince my father et al to let you stay in the human world. I told them that it was your home; you were born and raised there, and to remove you could cause further mental disturbances._ "

"You make it sound like I'm insane." Yusuke chided.

" _To be blunt, Yusuke, losing control of yourself and acting on the impulses of the voices in your head sort of makes you less than sane, as per the human standard. Now, if you leave the human world, you will then be judged according to demon world standards – and I'm sure Kurama could tell you what jail is like there."_ Yusuke looked over to the fox to see his morose expression. Not exactly comforting.

"So, what exactly are the rules – Koenma?" Yusuke looked back only to find that the toddler had disconnected.

"Bastard! You can't just hang up like that!" Yusuke raised an aggressive fist, but withdrew it just as quickly.

Genkai, sitting quiet through it all, stood up then. "Kurama can explain to you the circumstances of your restrictions, as well as all the things Koenma didn't have the balls to tell you." Yusuke started at the news.

"Wait, there's more?!"

"Naturally." Genkai finished her tea. "If you need me, you know where to find me, fox." And with that, Genkai left the two demons alone in the big, otherwise empty room.

"Hey! Don't just walk out when I'm trying to talk to you –" Yusuke went to take after her, but a hand on his shoulder stopped him dead.

"Yusuke." said boy cringed, not at all liking the way that his friend had said his name. He hated it when Kurama got all serious and grave – it gave him chills, to be perfectly honest. Yusuke turned around to face the fox a little unwillingly, avoiding eye contact.

"So..." Yusuke said after an awkward silence followed in which Kurama's hand did not move from his shoulder. "Are you gonna tell me the stuff or what..." Growing more and more uneasy, Yusuke tried to shake off the older demon's hand, to no avail. The fact his efforts were futile surprised him, since Kurama's fingers were touching him as softly as a whisper. Maybe that's what made it uncomfortable to him – he was so gentle, it was as if he was pitying him. Kurama's sigh drew Yusuke's eyes to his face, his expression impassable.

"The only thing that Koenma didn't tell you about your sentence is that you will be moving." Yusuke's brow shot up. "Moving?"

"Yes. As your...officer," Kurama's face scrunched up at the word, clearly uncomfortable with it. "I need to be able to keep an eye on you...twenty-four-seven." Yusuke's face wasted no time transforming into one of surprise.

"What? So, you gotta be around me, like...all the time?" Yusuke back tracked once he realized how rude that sounded. "Don't take that the wrong way, I just..."

"I understand." Kurama's hand on his shoulder tightened ever so slightly before dropping back to his side and disappearing into his pocket. "I, too, like my personal space." Though he got the feeling it wasn't intentional, Yusuke couldn't help but read into that statement a little. True enough, Kurama was one of those people, the kind Yusuke couldn't ever really understand. He was the sort of guy you gave a wide berth to on the street and who you didn't initiate any kind of physical contact with unless he did it first. Yusuke didn't know why, but it was just kind of an unspoken rule about Kurama – you didn't touch him unless he made it clear he _wanted_ to be touched. Which was hardly ever. Even now, with Kurama putting his hand on his shoulder, Yusuke could still sense, somehow, that it wasn't safe to initiate contact. His posture was withdrawn and his eyes more shadowed than normal. Touching Kurama now would very likely offend him, at best, or stir up an even worse reaction – one Yusuke could only have nightmares about, and which he hoped stayed safely in his head.

"So...does that mean we're moving in together?"

"Yes, Yusuke." Kurama chuckled, breaking some of the tension. "I've already spoken to mother about it. Now, if you don't mind, I think we can continue this conversation elsewhere, hm?"

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"hey," Yusuke huffed as he lugged his mostly empty suitcase out of Kurama's car. "Are you sure this is okay? I mean...I did hurt somebody once..." The pained expression on Yusuke's face prompted the fox to turn around and place a comforting hand on his back, just like he had before.

"I know you're not very confident in yourself right now, and I don't blame you at all. But...well, I have faith in you, if no one else does." Yusuke looked up at the fox, wondering when exactly he got taller than him. "I've seen you pull through things that even I could never hope to recover from. You're strong, Yusuke – you might not always see it, but I can." Yusuke couldn't stop himself from smiling a little at the warm look on the fox's face.

"Thanks, bud. You know, I noticed it once, but you're really the only person who's ever there all the time anyway." Kurama cocked his head to the side curiously as he listened, reminding Yusuke of a real fox. "I mean, who else answers the phone at four in the morning because I got drunk and can't drive home?"

"Well, it's not uncommon for me to be up at that hour anyway, so it's not that big of a deal." Kurama dismissed with a wave of his hand and a sheepish smile on his face.

"Still," Yusuke slung an arm over him, feeling it appropriate. "You're one hell of a friend. Even if you're also now my probation officer...speaking of which, how the hell did that happen, anyway?" Yusuke asked as they got to the door of Kurama's house.

"I volunteered for the job." Yusuke's brows went up at this. "It was either me or Hiei, and I was certain that you needed someone with a more level head to deal with your...episodes." Kurama explained. A "light-bulb" expression came onto his face then as he recalled something. "Ah, I also forgot to tell you: Koenma has put me in charge of figuring out exactly what kinds of events trigger these episodes – with that said, I would greatly appreciate it if you didn't try to eat me." It took a moment for the jab to settle in, but the stupid grin on the fox's face told Yusuke it was in jest – as did the fact that he practically bolted inside to get away from him.

"Hey! Not cool, man, not cool!"

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"So...exactly how are you supposed to figure out what's causing these 'episodes' as you refer to them as?" Yusuke asked quietly while fidgeting with a pencil he found on Kurama's old school desk, sitting on his friend's bed as the fox presently occupied said desk, reading through something. Yusuke was bored out of his mind – reading wasn't a popular hobby for him, and neither was doing anything else that required sitting for long periods of time. Checking the clock, it was 11:00pm – fourteen hours he'd been here, and there just wasn't anything left to do. He'd played with Shuuichi junior, had a video game tournament between him and the two brothers, helped Shiori with the dishes after having a rather awkward conversation with her about his reasons for staying here (Kurama had said it was because he forgot to pay rent too many times and now with Keiko's medical bills, he couldn't afford to live in his flat anymore). He and Kurama had attempted a game of Chess, but Yusuke just couldn't wrap his head around the concept. Switching to Shogi, Japanese chess, hadn't helped.

Kurama, or Shuichi as he was known here, sighed and placed down his book – a well-worn copy of some foreign book or another; it looked to be written in English, as Yusuke could discern looking over his shoulder after pacing about moments before.

"And what the hell are you reading?"

"I am reading an original copy of _Finnigan's Wake,_ if you must know."

"Sounds boring."

"It's quite interesting if you know how to read it." Kurama set the book down, touching the cover almost affectionately. He let out a deep sigh. "As for figuring out what the triggers are," He turned to Yusuke smoothly, coming to sit beside him on the bed in like. But it wasn't a casual smoothess – no, something was far too purposeful about it. "We don't have much choice but to do this by trial and error." Kurama said this as if it was a death sentence, his voice was so soft and tone uncharacteristically dark, even for him.

"Geez, man, don't make it sound like it's a death sentence. I mean, you wouldn't kill me unless you had to – right?" Yusuke said hopefully. A humourless smile passed over the fox's face.

"Of course not. But I am afraid that your life may not be the only thing that could die from this ordeal." He turned to Yusuke seriously, grasping his shoulders in the same feather-light grip as before. "I want you to know, before any of this even begins, that no matter what happens – you are always going to be a friend to me." Kurama's eyes fell as his head bowed. "You gave half your life energy for my sake. I'll never forget that. Neither will I forget the things you've taught me about humanity and the will to put others before yourself." Yusuke grew increasingly uneasy with all this. "But this – this isn't just a matter of pushing your buttons to see which goes boom, so to speak; Koenma has asked me to find out why you keep losing control – and in order to do that, I fear I must push you to and _over_ the edge. More than once." Yusuke swallowed thickly, intentionally keeping his mind off of how cunning he knew the fox to be.

"And how will you do that?"

"I don't know as of yet. That's up to you and how well you put up with it." Yusuke did not like the way his eyes sharpened as he said that.

"But...I mean, you...You wouldn't hurt me any more than you needed to, right?" Yusuke was transforming from uneasy to frightened, though he tried his damnest to hide it. He knew exactly how ruthless Kurama could be, and didn't wish his friend's ire upon anyone – least of all himself.

"Of course I wouldn't – but I don't think you quite understand what sorts of things, exactly, I might have to do to you."

"Well, if you'd tell me – " Yusuke went to raise his voice, but immediately thought better of it when he seen the cold expression on the fox's face, his eyes piercing through Yusuke's very soul.

"I am dead serious, Yusuke." Growing a little too uncomfortable, Yusuke tried to back away from the fox, suddenly finding him much too close for comfort, but was halted by a nearly imperceptible tightening of his friend's fingers on his shoulders – the only warning he would get, he knew, if this was going to end badly. He was feeling cornered, and a cornered Yusuke was a dangerous one, demon or not.

"Kurama?" He pleaded quietly, confused and scared by this side of Kurama, which he had seen used against opponents, even Hiei, but which he'd gravely underestimated the paralyzing power of until it was turned on himself.

"I don't want to hurt you, Yusuke. But I will if I have to. I promise I will try to be as gentle as I can be – but the nature of what he has asked me to do..." He trailed off, breaking eye contact as a sad look came onto his face. "It means that there's a good chance you won't ever forgive me." The fox whispered, his whole posture wilting like a flower.

"Hey, now, don't talk like that," Yusuke reassured, placing his hands on Kurama's shoulders in a mimicry of his friends own pose. "I've gone through hell being trained by Genkai and by Raizen and his men; I've lived through the Dark Tournament twice, AND been in the Makai Tournament; I might not have won, but I survived against demons who were out to flay my hide and fry me up for supper." Yusuke laughed at himself, easing the poignant unease in the air. "You...you're a scary guy, don't get me wrong," He admitted nervously, " But you're still my friend. That means I trust you – and that also means that whatever pacifier-breath tells you to do me is okay by me; if you feel like you have to hurt me in order to stop me from hurting someone else – "

"Or yourself." Kurama interjected quietly.

"Yeah, well if you have to hurt me in order for me not to hurt you, then it's fine."

"Yusuke, I don't – "

"Well, until you can make me understand, I'm telling you that it's okay." Kurama looked up at Yusuke then, an uncharacteristic sort of mistiness in his eyes, the emotion strange on his usually impassive face. He let out a dry chuckle then, shaking his head.

"Even in the face of your own destruction, you still find it in you to care about me." He whispered. "I don't understand you, Yusuke."

"Yeah, well I don't exactly get you either, fox-boy." Both now smiling, Yusuke found it in him to laugh. Kurama smiled wider at this, taking it as both a good and bad sign of things to come.

"Maybe that's a good thing." He whispered. _'Good job, Yusuke. You've passed my first test already, and you didn't even know it. Unfortunately, it seems like your instincts will need to be stimulated by more drastic means, however – and I am not yet sure even you will have the fortitude for that.'_

Feelings largely mixed, Kurama figured there was no harm in initiating the next phase of his tests – by far the easiest, but also likely the most harmful. With that, he leaned forward slowly, but confidently, until his forehead just barely touched Yusuke's shoulder.

"Kurama? You okay?" Yusuke asked. "You're acting kinda strange."

"I'm fine, Yusuke...just tired." _'Please don't hate me for this, Yusuke. I am just as scared as you...I don't want to hurt you – and I'm scared precisely because I **do**.' _

_''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''_

 **Mwahahahahahaha!**

 **Next chapter will probably have some Yaoi in it – so you can all look forward to that! I will try to post within the next 2 weeks, but again, school...**

 **Until next time!**


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